Remembering

There are certain days that are etched on our souls.

We can barely remember what happened yesterday but we can remember every moment of that day, and sometimes it is replayed in living color.

I can see myself, a high school student, passing through our outdoor halls, hearing about the assassination of JFK. We all just stood still for a moment, this could not be happening in our country and our life time. The shock and horror reverberated though the halls and classrooms of Horace Greeley High School. We were all so insulated from hardship, trials let alone a murder of our President.

Without any effort, I can see the day of November 8th unfold before my conscienceness. Every detail engraved on my being from the first phone call from Italy, to the Pastor arriving at our house, to the house spontaneously filling up with friends and neighbors, to the trip to the airport, to the airline attendant running out to buy a leather journal for me to write in, to Paris, to Italy, to running up the sidewalk to my wounded first born.

And September 11, 2001 is indelibly marked on my being.

None of my children were home. I had just finished my devotions, taken a shower and had turned the TV on while I got dressed. A couple of weeks before we had delivered Ethan, as a freshman, to Messiah College in Pennsylvania. Liz was working as a nurse in Boston, Jon was in Chicago and Christian was returning by bus from a trip south.

I remember saying, "Oh, God, this can't be happening. Please, please Father reveal yourself to these people and save them. Help them listen to your voice and acknowledge your son." I could not believe the newsman was still broadcasting in a relatively composed voice. I was crying for those people.

My next thought was my children. Where were my loved ones in relation to this act of horror. And what was coming next?

No one knew what the next target was. But shortly we found out that Boston was the next possible target and something was happening in Pennsylvania.

Surprisingly, I was able to get through to Ethan and instructed him to listen and follow any directions given by the college administration.

After many attempts to reach Elizabeth, I finally got through. She told me all medical personale in Boston were mandated to their hospitals and were not allowed to leave. They were expecting scores of burn victims to be flown into Boston for medical treatment. "And Mom, there are F 16's circling Boston" "Yes, honey but God is with you and you can do this. You are strong and capable, pray for direction and listen for the Holy Spirit's voice. And do all that you are asked to do." Sadly, there were no victims.

Chicago did not seem to be on anyone's radar, so I guess I felt that Jon was relatively safe. And Christian arrived home in the early afternoon. Relief.

Sometines we get bored with regular, ho hum days. Days when nothing spectaculor happens. We take for granted that our family will all be together on special days, will celebrate milestones and successes and provide comfort for disappointments and challenges. And yet each one is special. A gift.

I called Rob to the kitchen sink the other day. "Look, the male and female cardinal are at the feeder at the same time!" I never see that. Usually, the males goes in first and if it is safe, he flys away so his mate can come in and eat. I like to pretend that this couple is the same couple of cardinals that I see each year. They come back to me each spring and suprise me with their presence over our summer days. But I never see the together at the feeder. And yet, a wonderful present this fall. The two together before they disappear for the winter. Ordinary wonders. Special beauties provided each day by a loving and caring creator.

Even admidst tragedy, horror, sadness and grief......God is